Detroit Tigers

The first Tigers blog of the pre-season, baseball is just around the corner and I couldn’t be more excited about it.

But the Tigers have me a little nervous.

A quick look at the cons:

Igesias hasn’t played ball in a year.

Cabrera is returning from serious ankle surgery.

V-Mart is returning from serious knee surgery.

JD Martinez, Rajai Davis, Victor all had career years.

Avila had several concussions.

Scherzer is gone.

Porcello, one of their most consistent pitchers last year is gone.

Everyone is a year older.

A quick look at the positives:

Price will be here all year.

Verlander will have a full offseason to train (as if that will matter).

Soria will be in the bullpen al year.

Joba Chamberlain is back (that’s a bad joke).

Better athleticism in the outfield.

That’s about it.

The cons far outweigh the pros in my book. Normally I wouldn’t be worried but with the revamping Chicago did this offseason, and with KC going to the World Series last year, and with Cleveland so close the last two years it is hard to feel good about this team.

Prediction: 84-78, second place.

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I never really got to that point of ‘sharing my life before you came around’ with my wife.

First off, we met when I was 22 and she was 20. So we didn’t have a whole ton of prior life to share. But before I met her I sure thought I had a lot going on. I was in design school, studying philosophy and art history on my own with my prior girlfriend, in a local band and into the local music scene much less than I thought I was. There was a jazz club on a rooftop in Greektown that my bandmates and I and other college friends would attend every Monday evening in the summers. I would spend a lot of time in the city taking photographs and documenting the state of the architecture and non-architecture. I had just spent some time in Europe taking classes. I would go to several concerts a year and watch dozens of films a week.

None of that life came with me when I started dating my wife. My band broke up; I got out of the local live music scene with it. I was done with school and was ready to be done with academics. Concerts got more expensive and less important to me. We did keep the film thing going, finding it something we had in common.

I have no real idea why any of that changed. I loved that little jazz club. It is probably still in service jamming away on Monday nights with a two drink minimum. I always told my wife I would take her there but I never have. I don’t go on photoshoots even though I got a new great camera last year. But even if I did, I have no idea if she would want to go. Local music can bite it for all I care at this point. I put far too much effort into that scene for a long time for it to matter to me now. I hope in earnest to revisit that scene with my own daughter or son and their own band in a decade and a half.

I went back to school. So I dragged my wife into what that is like for a couple years, but I never shared much because she wouldn’t even feign interest, and frankly, Architectural Theory? I barely understood it, how could she?

I tell her a lot about art projects in Detroit that I’ve seen, or how they renovated the cut a few years back and how we should bike ride down it. Hell, we live fifteen minutes away. And she always says she wants to do it, and I believe her. But we never do, we will never go, she will never experience those things with me.

I think mostly I’m to blame. I’ve experienced it and I’m too lazy to show it to someone else. Partially I doubt her interest level would be higher than tolerated, only increasing my laziness. And partially it is her big family. There is almost always something to do, especially in the summer, and boredom is the reason I discovered half of the things I was into before I met her.

And to be completely fair, she has gone with me to Cliff Bells twice.

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I’ve never won anything in my whole life.

I never won a music recital, hell I never even entered one.

I never won a sports championship.

I never won a talent show.

I never won a battle of the bands.

I was never first in anything, school, sports, life.

That’s not to say that I necessarily lost all of those things either. I just floated around mediocrity. I learned from an early age that competition was not something that drove me like it does with some people. And that I was more comfortable as the observer of greatness rather than the owner of it.

When I got to college I often worked with other people on their projects before I even began to think about my own. My many sleepless nights are more attributable to helping a friend find his or her way than putting grueling hours in on my own work. And if my work suffered for it, I didn’t mind much. I worked in this way so much that often after the professor would leave I would make my rounds to people I knew would want to get my perspective.

The competitive kids in class devoted all their time to their projects, and I devoted all my time to their projects too. I always did well, finished with 4.0’s in my studios but I never won honors (as the best project in the class). I’m not sure I would have anyways but having the drive to have the best project couldn’t have hurt.

I don’t regret it at all. It gave me my first inkling that I might want to teach. Professors noticed my helping role and sometimes asked me to sit on the critique panel for their other classes, which I enjoyed immensely.

When I got to Grad School, I studied history and theory because I believed it was a course to teaching, an idea I got from my position in undergrad. I would often find myself walking through the studios eager to help a fledgling student, which never happened. Not even once. I think they viewed me as a dinosaur and couldn’t understand what I might bring to the table.

Maybe the competition had raised that much in my few years away from school. Maybe my help was never that useful in the first place.

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I have spent my whole life waiting for something to happen to me.

When I was in rock bands I waited to be discovered.

When I was in design school I waited for a professor to have to have me work for him.

When I started working I waited to move quickly up the ranks and be taken under the wing of a superior to be groomed into a leading position.

None of those things happened, of course. Life isn’t a movie, and even if it was, I was never the one talented enough to be lavished with attention. Not the lead role. I’m more supporting cast type.

I realized recently that I can start my own webpage and write a blog for cheap. And it is possible that people will read it and I will gain some notoriety from it. But most likely not. Most likely it will work as a living journal to get out some of my ideas and make me feel better about the fact that I’m living on a five star cruise ship stuck at port.

I haven’t decided yet if that is okay or not, but I have decided there isn’t much I can do about it.

Some days this blog will be dark and some days hopefully amusing and some days uplifting but always honest.