Bipolar Thoughts

I’m terrified that I passed Bipolar on to my daughter.

It is a thought that consumed me during the pregnancy. It was the biggest reason I ever questioned having kids. And once I knew one was on the way I could not control my thoughts. Every few seconds of down time was instantly converted into pouring over whether or not my daughter would be bipolar.

My mother was diagnosed as bipolar when she was a teenager. I am not sure if that was the proper diagnosis, but she did have something irregular about her personality and mood. She might have had Borderling Personality Disorder which was often diagnosed as Bipolar in the past. Regardless, she had something, and it included depression, and she passed that on to at least me and probably some qualities to my sister as well.

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I tend to dip my toes very shallowly into a lot of different pools.

I have a lot of interests: music, physics, history, architecture, philosophy, science fiction, space, movies, guitars, cities, economics, politics, baseball, hockey, comedy. And I try to stay abreast of all of them, which is difficult being married and having a child.

But I don’t know I single one of those fields intimately. Anyone with more than a surface understanding of any of those topics could easily lose me in conversation.

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