Bipolar Thoughts

Maybe Not

I talked earlier about some hallucinations I was having, or at least just had on two separate occasions.

I just got home from my psychiatrist, and I informed him of the psychosis and he promptly told me that he did not think that those visions classified as psychosis.

In fact, he didn’t think they had anything to do with mental illness at all.

He said they were more in line with seizures, or strokes.

He also informed me that in some very rare cases, ECT can trigger additional seizures.

So that sounds like fun. The good news is that the reason ECT works is because your brain has a seizure. People who have seizures rarely suffer from depression. And when they do, the seizures almost always provide relief from the depression. So, if I am having seizures, it is only helping stave off my depression.

Is that a price to pay? I have never experienced any physical pain associated with a seizure, and I don’t want to. So, I wouldn’t trade full blown seizures for no more depression. But if I am having seizures now, I don’t notice it, and I probably would trade this for less depression.

My shrink isn’t worried. He said the infrequency and the quick return to normalcy after the vision probably indicates that nothing is really going on. But he admitted that he did not know what to make of it. His conclusion was that if it continued to happen, he would send me to a neurologist to rule out anything medical.

Needless to say, I wasn’t happy to hear this. I was expecting him to mention something about psychosis and talk about going back on an anti-psychotic like Latuda again. And instead, I hear I might be having seizures.

Pretty weird.